What is your perception of the word vulnerability in the context of your relationships? I quite often write about what comes up most frequently in sessions, and I notice people trying to avoid being vulnerable with others. This presents itself when I notice someone in the session having more of a limited ability to admit they are wrong, or that they made a mistake because then they would really be vulnerable. Author, Brene Brown, discusses that vulnerability means,” … that you have the courage to be imperfect” and that it is an ingredient to true connection with someone else. How many of us can say we have the willingness to say , “I love you” no matter if we feel anger or resentment toward someone we love?

A long time ago, when I used to think about the word vulnerable, I associated it with being weak or not in control. After a great deal of research and understanding, I uncovered for myself how essential vulnerability is for true attachment in couple, family and friend relationships. When we can essentially be our true selves with our blemishes and all, and still feel accepted and loved, then we have true attachment (acceptance) in these relationships. So many mask their mistakes, true feelings and emotions with those they love and then wonder why the relationship implodes. Vulnerability does not equal weakness, it equates to being truly connected with someone other than yourself.

To love someone is to be vulnerable. Curious as to what I mean by that?

Check out this video, Brene Brown discusses: The power of vulnerability.